Destiny or is it in your hands....
Fate or your decisions....
Which is true?
Do we have control, or is everything controlled for us in some way?
I love these types of conversations. About life, the meaning of life, how things are...anything truly personal. It really connects you to someone. It is hard to put yourself out there, to be vulnerable. To not only show the good side of you, but the not so good as well. To take things out of the closet, lay it on the table, and say; 'hey this is me, am I ok?' I can guarantee you, you are ok, and I have probally felt the same as you sometime in my life. There are so many times in life when we feel so alone. We do not understand a particular feeling we have and we think only we feel this way. However that is probally not true. We are human. The same things hurt our feelings, make us sad, and make us want to laugh. It is the ability to share and form a connection with others which is tough.
One of the people I admire most in this world has this amazing ability to be open and honest even about the most humiliting and embarresing topics. She will tell you exactly how she feels and she will never judge me for any of my feelings, no matter how ridiculous I think they are. Because of this I don't ever feel the need to pretend to be someone else, or hold anything back because I know she will always accept my feelings as 'my feelings'.
I wish everyone was able to be that open, including myself. I do think I am a very open person, but I am my own worst critic so I am not really sure.
There is a difference in honesty and a willingness to be humiliated. Humiliated is not even the right word. I guess just having the ablility to really put yourself out there. I used to hate the idea of being embarressed in public. Oh it just frightened me terribly. So I was quiet and shy, never really wanted to be the center of attention. I rarely talked, and gosh I would never tell a joke...people would laugh then. However those days are long gone. I am not searching for the spotlight, but I not afraid to speak my mind anymore. I feel how I feel...bottom line. If you don't like it I really hope you can at least understand my postion on it. And if we truly disagree I hope we can talk about it, and possibly I will be able to learn something I never knew before. I do silly things, people laugh at me...and I don't mind. I enjoy every day and try to make the best of every situation.
Life is to short.....
Well of course I have rambled on again, and did not even talk about what I wanted to. So stay tuned for destiny or your choice. :)