Not hiding

I was hiding under the covers

Afraid to get out

Afraid to see what was really there

Afraid to see all the things I have been avoiding


I am terrified

To see

To feel

To face my mistakes

I struggled

I fought

I came up with a million reasons

why it was better just to stay in bed

Yet one reason gave me the little nudge I needed

to get out

to breathe

to face what was right in front of me


My life was at stake

I was trembling

but I put my first foot on the floor,

I felt the coldness and almost pulled it right back up

I gathered all my strength and placed my second foot on the floor

I stood

I opened my eyes

I looked around

To my surprise what I saw

was beautiful

not so scary

and I sighed a huge sigh of relief

I choose to live,

to experience,

to not hide

And that felt really good!